Making this series must have stirred up a lot of emotions, but was it healing in any way?
Yes, absolutely. It certainly felt like it felt like I could come to a sense of peace in terms of my feelings towards my biological father, and have a sense of closure on something that was really unresolved for most of my life. I think it brought my family closer together as well. My moms and my sister, even though they didn’t want to have to go through the painful experience of having to deal with the lawsuit for the documentary, it ultimately did help us talk things out even further.
I read that you have two children; did telling this story about your upbringing affect the way you parented at all?
That’s interesting. Certainly becoming a parent affected me in terms of feeling like I was equipped to tell the story, and I do think it made me value how precious these moments with your children are. With my children, I just really want to be as present as I possibly can and enjoy them, because I have an 18-month-old and a five-year-old. It’s this funny duality, where in some ways it’s so wonderful and magical, and it’s also just so much hard work. In a way, the movie has helped me be like, “If I’m going to be with my children, I’m going to be all in.”
Do you think you’ll eventually show your children the series?
Well, I showed my five-year-old the clips that he’s in. He was proud. I mean, sometimes we make movies together for fun, and he sees me filming all the time with my cameras. We shot my second son’s birth, which is toward the end of the series, so he’s certainly aware of cameras. He knows the movie is about Nana and Grandma and our family.
I’m sure it will be amazing for your kids to watch the series as adults, too.
Yeah, absolutely. I hope that by that time—and I think this will be true, because it’s already happening— but by the time they’re old enough to see the film, it’s going to feel very dated in terms of what LGBTQ+ families had to go through.
Do you feel mostly hopeful about the future of queer family-making, or do you get stuck on how far we still have to go?
I mean, I think it’s incredible how far we’ve come in my lifetime. My lifetime coincided with the complete revolution of LGBTQ+ family rights. We still have far to go in terms of parents’ rights in many states, but to look at how far we have come is amazing.
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How Making ‘Nuclear Family’ Helped Documentarian Ry Russo-Young Come to Terms With Her Past - Vogue
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